Clothes Encounters    

1985

Al Simmons

This is a true story. In 1985 our washing machine broke. We decided to save money and order one direct from the factory. Our clothes chute kept delivering clothes from the second floor of our home to the laundry room. With a two and a four year old in the house the delivery of our machine seemed to take forever. By contrast, my frustration made writing this song easy.   

Our washing machine is broken 

Disconnected and out on the lawn, 

The laundry, that's sliding down the clothes chute, 

Don't even know its gone 

  

Down the chute they come sliding 

The shapeless and the latest in style 

The sweaty and soiled keep falling and falling 

Into the enormous pile 

  

I knew it was broken when it started to smoke 

And shake and rattle and rock 

Maybe it had finally eaten 

One too many sock 

  

And now the t-shirts land on the pile 

There's one with bullwinkle the moose 

A blue one with red stripes 

A pink one with white 

And one with cranberry juice 

They seem to be thinking they soon will be sinking 

Into water and white sudsy soap 

But they just lay there and reak their rank aroma 

Oh Lord there is no hope 

       I've been agitated and put through the wringer, 

       And now I know who to thank 

       If technology won't wash my clothes 

       Let me beat 'em with a rock on the river bank 

       instrumental 

Shirts - towels - underwear - 

And too many mismatched socks 

Not to mention the wools and unmentionables 

And I'm becoming distraught 

The clothing keeps dropping 

Less distance each time 

As the ceiling is drawing so near 

The room is so full it will burst and explode 

The laundry for miles and iIfear... 

That soon the last sock from the drawer will be used 

Wait! What's the rumble i hear? 

A-truck, a-knock, a-voice, a-ha! 

The maytag man is here.